The bonding of parents and offspring that’s divine,
Of husbands and wives and of lovers to each other,
Of siblings with siblings.that’s truly sublime,
But of a ‘saas’ and her ‘bahu’...’Tis dicey altogether!!

The mentality of a mother-in-law (mil)
Is splendidly staggering like a ‘double edged’ saw!
As convoluted as that of a daughter-in law (dil),
They’re sure made for each other like the cat and her paw!!!

In this incredible pattern of 3 vital beings,
Who has more rights.who has more leanings???
To whom does ‘He’ belong.lock, stock and barrel??
That’s the crux of a problem that has no parallel!!

The mother brims over with pleasure and pride,
As she perceives her son with a bride by his side,
She dreams of being a dream mom to his wife!
Blissfully oblivious, to what can unfold in life!!

The young bride basking in the magic of the moment,
With her proud, Prince Charming entrenched, firmly in her firmament,
Views her idyllic world through rose tinted spectacles,
And her new mom…, with cherubic innocence!

The weeks that ensue gladden the well-wishers’ heart,
For the home rings with cheeriness, laughter and warmth!
But ‘tis not for long for soon personalities clash,
And the dreaded, ‘I’, ‘mine’ and ‘ours’, raise their heads in a flash!

True, the mother gives birth and cares for her boy,
She loves him unconditionally, despite anguish or joy
Through the stages of infancy, adolescence and youth,
With a matchless concern, that’s an irrefutable truth!!

’Tis exceedingly hard, to share this joy, to let go
Only oodles of reason and maturity can help her in doing so,
‘Love without attachment’, the decidedly challenging remedy
Something simple and valid, but tough to espouse in reality!!

The moment the young bride, sets foot in her new home,
She has relinquished much more than her hubby and his dear mom!
She has forfeited a carefree life of lovely, cosy, togetherness,
With parents and siblings..will she get again ‘THAT’ happiness??!!

Thus a human saga evolves, fraught with sugar and spice,
With the onus on 3 souls to chart out their lives,
To make it sunny and pleasing, like a field of golden corn,
Or a trail of hurt egos, of hearts distraught and torn!!

The issues indeed are many, which can precipitate this plight
Only love, frankness and understanding, can help set things right!
When respect for the senior and a genuine fondness for the junior
Find firm roots in 2 hearts his sweetheart and his mother!!

If the modern young miss wishes to pursue a career,
But mom is not keen, and sees no reason for it either,
That very instant..the former’s hackles are up!
“That’s a wrong move, m..o.m.m.y!!” Now what’s up??

The ‘dil’ has dark visions of her freedom cruelly curtailed!
Her advancement, her progress, dangerously derailed!
She now views ‘HIS’ mom as an interfering ogre
Kitty battles are fun..provided the players remain sober!!

The dutiful son and the protective hubby,
Caught between the devil and the deep frothing sea,.
Offers, ‘ gentle advice’ to mom and ‘loving sense’ to his wife
While reflecting philosophically, on the intricacies of life!!!

It takes only an iota of pure motherly tolerance,
A delicious dollop of flattery, of daughterly commonsense,
To procure for the young miss, her gratified mom’s blessings,
And the unsurpassed ‘freedom’ to ‘pursue’ all that she pleases!!

When the admiring spouse is overly exuberant
Of his ladylove’s amateur culinary skill,
A cutely modest, ‘Nothing can beat mamma’s talent’,
Can eternally endear her to her delighted ‘mil’!

On an enchanting evening out ‘a deux ‘,
It never would hurt to invite mom-in-law too,
For this gesture of heartwarming thoughtfulness
With its touching trace of winning kindness,
Can only bring to the occasion, her sincere good wishes
And not in the least her superfluous presence!!

Tiny remembrances of shared moments,
Largesse of heart to forget upsets and torments,
Little mementoes that express affection,
Kind words of sincere appreciation,
Cementing strands, of enriching experiences
A readiness to be friends and cast aside differences
A willingness to empathize and go with the tide,
A commitment to build trust of a healing kind
A resolve to do so, by these 2 kindred spirits
Will confer harmony and happiness beyond all worldly riches!!

In a culture that imparts a glow of spirituality to motherhood,
That raises parents to a pedestal on par with the Lord,
An attitude of friendliness, adaptability and regard, would
Enable the young lady to live in contentment and accord!
For the faintest positive step in this direction by the ‘dil’,
Can work a marvelous miracle, on an ascerbic and possessive ‘mil’!!

Likewise, in a culture ingrained with the moral conviction
That the young bride on the threshold of a new connection,
Away from the comfort of folks, known, and familiar
Must be cared for with gentleness and love exemplar!!

For symbolic of Mahalakshmi.the Auspicious One,
She evokes enhanced hopes of good times to come,
Of an aura of well being, of no dearth and of true mirth,
And the capacity to fashion a Paradise on earth!!

If these values are revered and adhered to with patience,
In a spirit of forbearance and logical concurrence,
Each home would be a haven of great vibes and warm cheer,
The architects.his ‘precious’ mom and her priceless ‘daughter’,
None other!!!!!

Parvati Ganapathi
Ganpap@hotmail.com