 Dance like no one is watching
Growing up in south India in the days when Doordarshan was the sole entertainment provider, joining Bharatnatyam classes close to home was another excuse to be out of home and to hang out with my friends. I vividly remember my first class of Bharatanatyam; I was all of six, excited about my first salwar kameez and about meeting my friends on a Sunday afternoon.
Over the years, weekend dance classes became a routine and I slowly learnt the nuances of dance and started appreciating it. I started watching the dance performances on DD-1 and the urge to learn, perform grew. The usual round of performances at school, at my uncles’ wedding, a few moves for the annual day at school to the latest Bollywood and Kollywood beats were all a part of life as a budding dancer. As with most kids in India, at some point of time board exams and entrance exams became more important than dance classes and slowly dance took a back seat in my life.
Years later, now an engineer, older, wiser and in another country, more than the craving for curries from Madras I craved for more knowledge of my country - its diverse culture and its glorious past. Ah! How I wish I had been more attentive in my history classes at school and had taken a few minutes to enjoy the sculptures at the temples my mother dragged me to. Reading numerous books on India, I realised I needed to get back to Bharatanatyam, to appreciate Indian culture and to give an outlet for the dancer in me.
Searching for a dance teacher, my quest was contrary to the numerous Indian parents asking “When will my daughter be on stage?” Instead, “I want to learn the basics of Bharatanatyam, the mudras, the adavus all over again, go through the technique, learn its history and enjoy it and I don’t want to be on stage”. I wanted a class that reaffirmed the traditional standards from back home and not let go the standard and technique for
commercialisation.
I started dancing at Sunanda’s Performing Arts Center (SPAC) in Stafford. It was tough getting back, the muscles refused to cooperate but I felt like never before. Today, 15 months after I started dancing, I realise exploring the beauty and scope of the 4,000-year-old tradition of Bharatha Muni is a never-ending process and the more you learn the more you crave for it.
I started performing on stage because I learnt that I can never grow as a dancer without being on stage. I realised the truth in the quote by Shirley Maclaine “Then come the lights shining on you from above. You are a performer. You forget all you learned, the process of technique, the fear, the pain, you even forget who you are - you become one with the music, the lights, indeed one with the dance.”
In spite of my hectic Americanised lifestyle, I make time for my dance classes and I learn something new every weekend. Through these classes I learn about spirituality and bhakti, the literature and poetry of ancient India, the epics and mythology of our land, the rich and varied heritage and learning, as they say, is a never-ending process.
With my first tryst with live orchestra in years, I am eagerly looking forward towards ‘Kinkinni’, the annual recital from SPAC on March 18 at the Old Stafford Civic Center. I hope to bring out the dancer in me, grow, learn and enjoy being on stage and being a dancer. This from someone who did not want to be on stage!! Dance indeed has changed my life - for good!
Vinitha Rajan Chinnakani
Houston, Texas, USA
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