Pugazhendhi-3
THE FATHER
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A small part of the family
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Pugazhendhi has four children -- Thirumeni, Kavitha, Babuji and Buddhan. Unlike many musicians, he never wanted his children to take to music. That was because he didn't want them to go through the trauma that he underwent in the early days of his musical career. A strict father, there was nothing in life he wanted than for his children to be educated and well settled! After devotion to K V Mahadevan (KVM), and his wife Sethulakshmi, it is this single-minded purpose that marked him as a different man.
He had struggled in life because he was not educated. Therefore, he was all the more keen that his children should not suffer on that score. So, he insisted that they study well.
He had knocked on several doors before getting attached to KVM. He knew he was lucky among the several thousand youths who want to make it in the cinema field. So he forbade his children from taking up music.
"We were all musically inclined. However, the only opportunity we got to get close to music was on weekends when we were allowed to go to the recording theatres, because our mother considered us a boisterous bunch. After a certain age, even that stopped and we were slowly cut off from the field," remembers
Thirumeni.
They concentrated on their studies as Daddy did not want them to have anything to do with movies.
Thirumeni holds an MBA from XLRI, Jamshedpur, and works in Australia.
Kavitha is a postgraduate who has a son in college and another in school.
Babuji is a renowned cardiologist, who is still studying in the US.
Buddhan is a vet of repute and has been in the US since 1989.
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The prized collection
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Few other families connected with the film industry can boast of such accomplishments in the educational field and in professional careers. Nothing gave more pleasure to this proud father, who didn't have the opportunity of formal education, to see them getting their degrees. He had framed their graduation pictures and lined them on the living room wall. When somebody suggested that they might attract the evil eye (kannu pattudum), he removed the four pictures to the bedroom wall!
The children were kept off the music field but music is in their blood - they love the songs of the '50s and the '60s in particular, which is considered a golden era in the Tamil film industry.
The children learnt music on their own. Two of them play the guitar, and one, the sitar. "All this came after they had chosen their areas of specialisation. So then my husband was confident they would be well settled in life," explains
Sethulakshmi.
But the same father encouraged all the grandchildren to learn and practise music. One of them plays the piano and sings, while another plays the tabla. Once he was sure his grandson would continue the tabla classes, he chose one of the best ones from Hyderabad and had it shipped all the way to Australia.
"When he came to stay with us in the US, he would quietly watch my daughter play the piano. When I opined that maybe she should learn some other instrument, he told me that the piano was the basic for all music, and that I must encourage her to learn it," remembers Gayathri, wife of
Buddhan.
A strict father but an indulgent grandfather.
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Pugazhendhi and his wife after
marriage
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The atmosphere at home was congenial for the children to grow up with a broad mind. "When I first came to the house after our quiet wedding, I was very puzzled. There we were all at the dining table, speaking several languages at the same time. Daddy and Mummy (that's also what they called each other) were speaking in Malayalam, but father and children were speaking in Tamil. The children switched over to English while talking to one another and to Malayalam while addressing their mother," laughs Usha, wife of
Thirumeni.
She even thought her parents-in-law were from different states. "I thought he was a Tamil, and she a Malayalee!" recalls
Usha.
"When I was in school, the teacher and other kids wanted to know if my parents had an inter-caste marriage because we spoke Malayalam but our second language in school was Tamil. When I asked my father about it, he jokingly said, 'Yes, tell them it was an inter-caste marriage and that we got a gold medal from the government for it'. I did not know it was a joke, and repeated it in school. And all of them believed it," says Kavitha.
Usha was also puzzled by a big picture of Jesus Christ and Indira Gandhi hanging on the walls of the living room. "Is your father a Christian and a politician," she asked Thirumeni innocently.
He explained that his father respected all religions and had a special place in his heart for that "fearless woman Indira Gandhi".
Though shocked at the untimely
death of his father who was in fine health, Thirumeni remembers,
"My father once quoted from Tirukkural:
'Thanthai magarkatrum nandri avayathu
mundi iruppa cheyal'.
'Magan thanthaikatrum udavi ivan thanthai
ennotran kol enum sol'.
I think both sides have kept their promise," he concluded.
(Concluded)
Pugazhendhi-1
| Pugazhendhi-2 | Pugazhendhi-3
S Chitra
R Rangaraj
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