What are conflicts in business?

Conflict is not basically bad. If you deal with people, you will, sooner or later, have to deal with conflict. Conflict simply stems from differing viewpoints. Since no two people view the world exactly the same way, disagreement is quite normal.

The reason conflict is often dreaded is because of the emotional aspects that come along with it. When there is conflict, it means that there is disagreement between two or more individuals. The conflict is usually in relation to interests or ideas that are personally meaningful to either one or both of the parties involved.

Unmanaged conflict can lead to bad feelings and even violence. The key to managing conflict effectively is to learn the skills necessary to become good at handling conflict.

How to resolve conflict that arises in inter-personal relationships

Sometimes in inter-personal relationships, such as those between you and one of your employees, there may be a conflict that you are not aware of. If someone who is normally upbeat and friendly toward you suddenly begins avoiding you or being rude, there is usually a reason. In these instances, you will want to address the problem by following these steps.

• Determine the problem

• Set up a private face-to-face meeting

• In a casual manner, ask the person if there is a problem. If they don't see a problem, let the person know that you think there is something between both of you.

• As you talk, ask for feedback. Do not make accusations.

• Try to listen to each other with open minds.

• Be sure to respect each other's opinions.

• Take a few minutes to recycle the other person's opinions in your mind.

• Try to determine why the other person felt the way they did.

• Avoid “finger-pointing”.

• Try to work out a compromise that works for both of you.

• If this does not result in a satisfactory solution, you may need to bring in an unbiased, third party.

How to resolve conflicts that arise in meetings

Conflicts in meetings can be very disruptive. But they can also be very helpful. Remember, conflicts are disagreements. If the person who is disagreeing with you is raising valid questions, it may benefit the group to address the issues they are presenting. In fact, by listening to them, you may gain valuable insight into what is and what is not working within your organisation. However, if the person continues past the point of disagreement to the point of disruptiveness, specific steps should be taken. Below is a list of conflict resolution tactics that you can use for meetings that get “out of control”.

• Find some “grain of truth” in the other person’s position that you can build upon.

• Identify areas of agreement in the two positions.

• Defer the subject to later in the meeting to handle.

• Document the subject and set it aside to discuss in the next meeting.

• Ask to speak with the individual after the meeting or during a break.

• See if someone else in the meeting has a response or recommendation.

• Present your view, but do not force agreement. Let things be and go on to the next topic.

• Agree that the person has a valid point and there may be some way to make the situation work for both parties.

• Create a compromise.

How to resolve conflict that arises while negotiating or bargaining

When you are negotiating with your clients, vendors, or even your employees, it is important to always keep in mind the idea that both parties are seeking a win/win situation. No one wants to feel like they are giving away something for nothing. In fact, most conflicts arise because one party feels like the other party is taking advantage of them. In order to avoid these types of situations, there are certain principles you can apply to increase your chances of a successful negotiation.

• Avoid defend-attack interaction

• Seek more information by asking questions

• Check your understanding and summarise what you have agreed upon

• Try to understand the other person’s perspective

How to maintain harmony in your business

Regardless of the type of conflict you are dealing with, there are several general rules you should follow whenever you are trying to bring harmony to a volatile situation.

• Reflect your understanding of the other’s position or opinion.

• Let the other person know that you value him/her as a person even though his/her opinion is different from yours

• State your position or opinion.

• To become a good conflict manager requires a lot of practice. Just remember that the goal is to reach a compromise that both of you can live with as well as be happy with. In other words, find a way that both of you can walk away feeling like a winner.

Vinod Kuriakose

(The writer Vinod Kuriakose can be contacted at feedback2vinod@yahoo.co.uk)